Pipe down, inner critic. Speak up, inner champion

Most of us are very familiar with our inner critic.

We know exactly what it sounds like.
We know its favourite lines.
And we know how quickly it shows up when we try to do something new at work or in life.

You’re not ready.
You’re going to make a fool of yourself.
Who do you think you are?

For many professional women, this voice becomes the background noise of everyday life. It shapes decisions, keeps ambitions small and quietly chips away at confidence. 

But what many people don’t realise is this:
the inner critic is rarely alone.

There is usually another voice present. Quieter. Less dramatic. Easier to miss.

I like to call it the inner champion.

1. Two voices, one decision

I first became aware of my own inner champion during my coach training in 2022.

We were doing an exercise about inner voices, and I volunteered to be coached in front of the group. The issue I brought was one that had been circling in my head for months: When will I feel ready to call myself a coach?

I was already in the training, already practising, already doing the work. But a part of me kept thinking: Not yet. You need more experience. More qualifications. More PROOF.

My tutor asked me to listen for the different voices that appeared when I thought about stepping into that identity.

The first one was familiar. A strict, demanding voice that pushed me to do better and never quite let me rest. I recognised her from therapy. She became known as Miss P (Miss Perfect) – my inner critic.

But there was another voice too. Softer. Steadier. It said:

You can do this, Carmel. You can do anything you put your mind to.

When we explored where that voice came from, the answer surprised me.

It was my maternal grandmother. 

She had always believed in me. Quietly, consistently. Her message had never been dramatic. It was simply: Do your best.

She died the year before I moved to Madrid, but her voice – and her belief in me – stayed with me. 

(This is such a random photo but it's the best one I can find of Grandma - this is my first meal at home after 9 months backpacking around the world aged 19. Grandma and I are clearly both very happy to be reunited 💖 My little brother is less convinced  🤣). 

2. Why the inner critic is louder

If we all have both voices, why does the inner critic usually dominate?

Partly, it’s how our brains are wired. We’re built to notice threats more than encouragement. Psychologists call this the negativity bias — the brain’s tendency to focus more on what might go wrong than what is going well.

The critic feels useful. Protective. Sensible. Especially for high-achieving professionals who have built their careers on standards, performance and responsibility.

The inner champion, by contrast, can sound naïve. Unrealistic. Even embarrassing.

And for many women, that voice has been quietly discouraged over the years. We’re taught to be humble, to downplay our achievements, not to appear too full of ourselves. Over time, the critic becomes the default setting. The champion fades into the background.

3. What the inner champion voice actually sounds like

One of the things I love about working on these voices with clients is how different everyone’s champion voice is.

It’s rarely a motivational speaker.
It’s rarely dramatic.
And it’s almost never cheesy.

For one client, her champion voice took the form of Elsa from Frozen.

Not the dramatic, ice-castle moment.
But the quieter message underneath: Let it go. Good enough is good enough.

She had spent years in a high-pressure environment where perfection was the baseline. That Elsa voice became a way of reminding herself that she didn’t have to carry everything all the time.

For another client, a former Netflix employee, her champion voice was shaped by that company’s co-founder, Reed Hastings. She’d been deeply inspired by his leadership style and belief in people.

Her champion voice sounded simple, almost understated:

You’re capable. Trust your instincts. If it doesn’t work, you’ll adjust.

No drama. No overthinking. Just calm confidence. And that was exactly what she needed to build confidence in her next career move.

4. The difference it makes at work and in life

The inner critic and the inner champion don’t usually disagree about facts.

They disagree about interpretation.

The critic says:
You’ve never done this before. You’ll probably fail.

The champion says:
You’ve never done this before. You’ll learn as you go.

Same situation.
Completely different outcome.

When the critic is in charge, we stay small. We delay decisions. We wait for the perfect moment that never comes. We stay in jobs we’ve outgrown or hold back from opportunities that could stretch us.

When the champion is allowed a seat at the table, things shift. Not overnight. Not dramatically. But enough to create momentum and a different quality of decision-making. 

 5. How to strengthen your inner champion

Your inner champion isn’t something you invent. It’s something you recognise and strengthen.

Just like any voice, it gets louder the more you tune into it.

For me, that meant paying attention to the way Grandma used to speak to me. The calm confidence in her tone. The sense that things would work out because I would figure them out.

Now, when I’m about to do something that scares me — like stepping into a new professional chapter, or delivering my first ever Facebook Live — I try to dial up the volume of her voice.

Not the critic’s.

Hers.

And this week, I’ll be doing exactly that.

On 18 February 2026 at 13:00 (Madrid time), I’ll be hosting my first ever Facebook Live inside the IWBB community. And I can already feel both voices preparing their speeches.

The critic is sharpening her lines. But this time, the champion gets the microphone.

6. A practical way to fuel your inner champion

There’s also a very practical side to this work.

Our brains have a natural bias towards what went wrong. Psychologists sometimes refer to the reticular activating system — the part of the brain that filters what we notice. If we’re not careful, it becomes very good at spotting mistakes, awkward moments and perceived failures, and very bad at noticing what went right.

In other words, the inner critic gets a steady stream of evidence. The inner champion… not so much.

That’s why I often suggest clients create what I call a “trumpet folder” — a place where you actively collect small wins, kind words, positive feedback and moments you felt proud of yourself.

It doesn’t have to be elaborate. It could be:

• a folder in your email
• a note on your phone
• a page in a notebook
• an album of screenshot
• or a physical folder on your desk

I even have a weekly reminder in my calendar to do this. And if I’m honest, I still don’t always manage it. What I do have is a simple note on my phone where I jot down small wins — a kind message from a client, a session that felt meaningful, a special parenting moment.

Nothing dramatic. Just evidence.

Over time, those small pieces of evidence give the inner champion something to work with. Instead of speaking in vague encouragement, it can say:

Remember that session that went well?
Remember the feedback you got last month?
Remember how you handled that situation?

The critic collects its own data automatically. The champion usually needs a bit of help.

7. A short reflection

If you pause for a moment, you may be able to hear your own champion voice.

It might sound like:

• a parent or grandparent
• a teacher who believed in you
• a friend who always has your back
• a former boss or mentor
• a younger version of yourself
• or simply a quieter, steadier part of you
  

Ask yourself:

• When have I felt most encouraged in my life?
• Whose voice gave me confidence?
• What does my inner champion actually say?
  

You don’t have to invent this voice.

You just might not be listening yet.

8. A gentle invitation

If your inner critic has been running the show for a while, you’re not alone. Many of the professional women I work with arrive in exactly that place — capable, experienced, but held back by self-doubt or the fear of getting it wrong or upsetting others or the status quo. 

Coaching isn’t about silencing the critic completely. It’s about strengthening the champion as a natural counterbalance.

If you’d like to explore what your own inner champion sounds like — and how to give it more space in your decisions — I’d love to support you.

I offer a free 30-minute discovery call where we can work on it together.

You can book a time that suits you here:
👉 https://calendly.com/carmel-drake/discovery-call

Because the critic will always have something to say.
The question is: which voice do you want running your life?